


Disarm You with a Smile

by lossie



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Family, Family Issues, Gen, Humor, Hurt/Comfort, I Blame Tumblr, I Don't Even Know, Kid Fic, Odin's A+ Parenting
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-11-24
Updated: 2014-09-15
Packaged: 2018-01-02 11:47:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 9,115
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1056387
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lossie/pseuds/lossie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Loki needs help, Tony is a better father than Odin, Thor gives awesome hugs and the Avengers are left with a five year old version of their former enemy to care for, because Fate is a bitch.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Expect the Unexpected

**Author's Note:**

> I have this strange fascination of sorts with stories where Tony acts for a time like Loki’s guardian/father. I don’t know why. This story here was inspired by many fanfictions that I’ve read over the last few months, so I’m sorry in advance for any similarities between it and those fics - it’s not really intentional (and I think it’s only the begining that kind of reminds me of some other story).  
> Anyway, I hope you’ll like it. I’ve just started chapter 2 and I guess I will be done with it tomorrow, because the Goddess of Inspiration has made my mind go crazy and I can’t stop writing (please, sent help!).
> 
> Enjoy!

When Loki came back almost a year after the whole alien invasion, it’s without any sort of disturbing blue cubes, evil schemes for world domination or glowing sticks of eternal doom. In fact, he had just kind of appeared out of thin air one day without any warning from Thor or the rest of the Asgardian folk. The date wasn’t more precise, because no one expected him to come back and SHIELD had just sort of missed the Bifrost-related Aurora Borealis this time around.  Or Loki just came by some others means of transport. Not that Tony knew a thing about interdimensional travelling.  
  
Anyhow, if it wasn’t for Tony who had a habit of running away from every business meeting or conference he could run away from (mostly because sometimes there was no Pepper to keep him in place), they still wouldn’t have known.  
  
He was sent on one of those utterly boring and completely ridiculous charity events that Pepper insisted were important for the company and he couldn’t care less about. Of course he wanted to help and giving away money for a good cause was okay with him, but he preferred to be the good guy as far away from press and boring-to-death parties as possible. He was out before the thing actually really started and five miles away in a McDonald’s within the next fifteen minutes, because cheeseburgers in an almost empty restaurant were far better than any fancy dinner with those bureaucracy hyenas as company.  He had ordered his four cheeseburgers and one large black coffee with an astounding amount of sugar before moving to the back of the store and then outside. The place smelled like burned oil and homeless people – the worst possible combination of scents known to mankind. He started eating and was half way through the second sandwich, when he spotted Loki.  
  
At first he thought that his sleep-deprived and slightly over-caffeinated brain was playing tricks on him.  
  
After all there was a possibility that it was one of those insane hipster kids, who got it to their heads that Loki was a pretty cool guy. Apparently destroying New York and killing hundreds of people in the process was okay as long as their favourite music stores and cafes remained unscratched. Some of them even got their hair cut and dyed to resemble the madman. Tony was quite sure he would never be able to understand it.  
  
It took him a few more glances in the direction of the mysterious man before he was one hundred percent sure. Then again he was pretty damn exhausted. After almost dying in the space, he was no longer able to sleep through the night without waking up from a nightmare. The explosion of the Chitauri mother ship and then the seemingly endless fall still plagued him. As if it wasn’t enough, the Mandarin happened and literally blew his life into pieces for a while. He was better now, but it was still too fresh in his memory to dismiss.  
  
As he watched Loki, he thought about all the things the man had done – all the deaths,  the unimaginable property damage, the people who became homeless afterwards, because the alien army had destroyed their homes – and he wanted to punch him. It was petty, he knew, because Thor told them shortly after returning from Asgard that Loki was under the same spell that Barton and Selvig were, but for much longer, and that he was himself again, thanks to their father (whatever that meant). It still didn’t make it fair, though. Tony wanted to blame someone and Loki was the best option. Up until now, when he could actually see how sickly Loki looked, it was easy to pile it all up on the guy.  
  
But Loki didn’t look like someone hell bent on bringing Earth to its knees, but more like a guy who needed medical attention and some seriously long vacation.  
  
As Tony observed him from afar, he could clearly see how thin Loki was. From what he could make out of his face, it looked pale and gaunt.  The shadows under his eyes were the mean greenish purple shade,  a telltale of many sleepless nights. His clothes were a mix of random colours and materials. He was eating his fries slowly, as if he wasn’t particularly enjoying them, more like forcing them down his throat. To put it simple, he looked like he needed help. He seemed so small and broken that Tony, with all that hate bottled up inside and ready to explode, couldn’t bring himself to hold him accountable for what had happened. It just didn’t seem right. Tony knew how it felt to be reduced to something so insignificant that living literally hurt. He had been there a few times during the last few months. The gut-wrecking realization that he was nothing more than a speck of dust in the greater scheme of things and that he was still lonely, after all these years of trying and failing to built more or less normal relationships with people, had turned him into a shadow of his former self. He was definitely more subbed and less self-obsessed, because he had learnt the hard way that he was not a centre of the universe.  
  
Most of all, he knew how it felt to lose the sight of what made him his own person. He just knew.  
  
Without much ado, he rose from his sit and marched to Loki’s table. He stood in front of the God of Mischief for a moment before sitting down in front of him, putting his two remaining cheeseburgers on the table.  
  
Loki didn’t acknowledge him. He seemed removed, in a way, as if he was running on his instincts and habits alone. It was sad, really, to see someone who had almost brought America to her knees in such a state.  Tony really wasn’t going to ponder about this sudden burst of compassion for the guy, because he valued his mental health. Or whatever remained of it.  
  
After long minutes of rather uncomfortable silence (at least on his part), Tony shrugged his shoulders and started to eat, glancing at Loki only once in a while. When he was done with his meal, he just slowly sipped his still warm coffee. His eyes were trained on Loki’s form as the guy finished his fries and then proceeded to fold the empty cardboard container.  He didn’t seem to know that he was not alone anymore. It’s quite clear in the way he moved. Or maybe he just didn’t care. There was little difference to Tony.  
  
“Hello, kid,” he said in a quiet voice, as if he was scared that the man before him would run for it otherwise, and only them Loki looked up, but he didn’t look at Tony. His gaze fell somewhere behind Tony’s head. Whatever. At least he seemed to pay attention to him, which was an improvement in and on itself.  
  
“Who is there?” Loki’s question was soft, barely above a whisper. He blinked a few times, then extended his left arm and cautiously reached ahead, as if trying to touch Tony.  And Tony finally realized why the God of Mischief hadn’t acknowledged him yet.  
  
Loki gasped air for a while, before Tony decided to let his self-preservation instincts go to hell and slowly took the slightly shaking hand in his own. The first thing he noticed was how cold Loki’s skin truly was and how bony were his fingers. Loki froze in place, his body stiff with tension and his eyes going unbelievably wide in shock. He sure as hell wasn’t expecting that, which Tony noted with badly concealed amusement.  
  
“Man of Iron, as your brother insist on calling me,” he answered eventually, lowering his hand to the table and then lightly squeezing Loki’s  fingers. It was a gesture of reassurance. He would be damned before letting Loki flee after finding him. Especially since the guy appeared so helpless in this state, as if this whole situation was entirely foreign to him, which probably was the case. “I personally prefer Iron Man, though it’s still technically a mistake, because the suit is not actually made out of iron. That would have been just plain stupid. Anyway, you can call be Tony.”  
  
There was a pause before some sort of recognition passed over Loki’s face. Tony could see it now – how clouded and pale were his pupils.They also didn’t dilate or constrict with the ever changing light. They stayed the same size even when a particularly large van passed them by, its reflectors at full blast, making Tony’s eyes tear up abruptly. It was kind of disturbing, really. He had never encountered a blind person in his life. He did some awesome prototypes of improved white canes a few years ago, but that was pretty much it. He was grateful for his memory, because the research he had done before starting that project was the single thing that really kept him from freaking out.  
  
“Tony.” Loki bowed his head in what, Tony guessed, was a general direction of his voice.  He pulled his hand away from Tony’s, flexing his fingers, before putting it onto his lap. “You are one of Thor’s Midgard companions, one of the Avengers.”  
  
It wasn’t a question. His voice was still soft and quiet, almost tentative. Tony wasn’t sure what to make of it, because to his ears it sounded awfully like Loki was afraid. It shouldn’t have been a surprise, given the fact that Thor’s little brother always stuck Tony as someone a bit paranoid. His time on Asgard apparently didn’t help in that department, only adding up to it.  
  
“Yeah, one and the same.” He grinned before catching himself. Well, that was even harder than he expected, to be honest. Though if Loki was completely healthy, Tony would have probably just called Thor to deal with this. He couldn’t quite understand why he didn’t do it despite everything, to be honest, but it had something to do with the fact that it was pretty damn obvious that Loki fled from Asgard. After all, neither Thor nor his parents seemed aware that the younger prince was on Earth. Or they didn’t thought it was important to inform puny mortals about that. He was inclined to grant the guy his right to explain himself before taking him anywhere or calling anyone. It was only fair.  
  
“I assume nobody knows you’re here, right?” After a brief moment of hesitation, Loki nodded. “Okay, so you ran away and are hiding here. And it’s clear you have absolutely no idea what you are doing, correct?” Another nod. “Well, isn’t it just great?”  
  
Tony laughed mirthlessly, rubbing at his temples and wishing for more coffee to clear his mind. The situation was so over his head. He was sitting with a (most probably) physically and (clearly) mentally unstable god in the McDonald’s backyard in bumfucknowhere. If it wasn’t ridiculous then he didn’t know what was.  
  
“Okay, right.” He took a few steady breaths. Loki was still looking over his shoulder, but his head was slightly bend. It was a strange sight, but at the same time Tony had never seen Loki look so boyish before and for the first time he wondered just how old the guy was, because he sure as hell didn’t look a year older than twenty.  
  
Tony sighed. He was so going to regret this.  
  
“First of all, are you hungry?” As he expected, Loki shook his head. “You sure? The fries were pretty small and you look... Well.” He cleared his throat. He decided to let the topic drop for the time being.  “Do you trust me?”  
  
Loki stiffed again, as if the question was not as simple as it was. As if he was looking for a trap and Tony wasn’t really surprised. Loki’s paranoia apparently reached far deeper than he thought.  
  
“Yes,” Loki replied after some time of what looked like careful consideration. Tony blinked. He didn’t actually expect that answer, but he could surely work with that.  
  
“That’s good, I guess,” he remarked, the bewilderment clear in his voice. “Do you want to come back to Asgard?”  
  
“No.”  
  
Well, wasn’t it a surprise?  
  
“Okay, no Asgard.” So the family issues were still very much there, it seemed. Thor had said that it had been dealt with when the enchantment was lifted from his brother’s mind, but there was probably more wishful thinking than actual truth in his declaration. “And New York? I would have proposed Malibu, but I kind of lost the house. Well, it was blown up, but we’re so not going into semantics right now. Anyway. Thor and the rest of the team are there, in NY, in my tower. Or in our tower if you think about it. You know, the building you used the last time to... No, we’re not going there either.”  
  
He was babbling like an idiot. Loki’s face, devoid of any emotion, was making him incredibly nervous. Somehow it seemed easier to talk to the man when he was acting like a lunatic. Pepper would have probably stated that it was because Tony himself wasn’t completely sane. Tony disagreed.  
  
“So. New York?”  
  
Loki did this strange motion between shaking and nodding his head, clearly unsure of what to do. In the end, he whispered a scarcely audible ‘yes’. Tony didn’t know what to make out of this decision. New York, where people would sooner walk around naked than admit that Loki was innocent of his crimes, was apparently a better hideout than Asgard, where the guy was a fucking prince. There was something amiss in this picture, not that Tony had time or any inclination to think about it right now.  
  
He fished out his phone and dialled Happy’s number.  
  
“ _What’s up, boss?_ ” Came the rough voice from the other side of the line. “ _Anything interesting going on?”_  
  
Tony chuckled.  
  
“Yeah, you could say that.” He glanced briefly at Loki. “Listen, how long will it take for the jet to be ready?”  
  
“ _I dunno, probably two hours, if I tell Finn to start now._ ” There was a pause. “ _You ran away from that dinner, didn’t you?_ ”  
  
“Oh, you know me so well!” He could hear Happy’s exasperated sigh.  
  
“ _Ms Potts won’t like it, you know that, right?_ ”  
  
“ Luckily, I’m quite used to it. She will come around. Besides if I didn’t I wouldn’t have found something that apparently went missing.”  
  
“ _What?_ ”  
  
“Nothing. I’ll fill you in when I get there. Or later. Just tell Finn to start, I’ll try to make it fast.” His eyes fell once again on Loki. The clothes he wore were old, ragged and smelled. From up close he could see that they were also a few sizes too big. “And if you are at that, go somewhere and buy me some clothes.”  
  
“ _Clothes?_ ” Happy parroted as if he wasn’t sure he heard him right.  
  
“Yes, clothes. Man clothes. Like a pair of trousers, socks, undies, a T-shirt and maybe a jumper or a sweater, whatever you can get will be okay, I guess. Full service. Make it small or medium. Or something in-between. ”  
  
“ _Shoes?_ ” Happy asked, apparently deciding to go with the madness.  
  
“Yeah, that too.”  
  
“ _Anything else, boss?_ ”  
  
“No, that’s all. Just try to hurry up.”  
  
“ _Of course._ ”  
  
Tony hung up and looked at Loki, who gave the impression of someone deeply confused for some reason. He didn’t have to consider it for long, because a woman stepped out of the store at that very moment. She was wearing the custom McDonald’s uniform, a look of concern on her face.  
  
“Are you a cop?” She asked him, fidgeting with her hands anxiously. He shook his head. “O-Okay. You are not going to hurt him, right? He hasn’t done anything, I swear. He just sits there or inside and... Just don’t hurt him, please?”  
  
He looked between Loki and the woman, and then it drew on him. She was the one who gave Loki those fries. She was also the one who kept him remotely safe while he has been there. It was obvious, the way she glanced at him every few seconds. She was worried.  
  
Tony smiled.  
  
“He is my friend’s brother. We were looking for him for quite some time,” he lied smoothly and the woman visibly relaxed. “I’ll be taking him home.”  
  
“That’s nice,” she said with a small smile on her own. Then she turned around and was almost inside, when she made up her mind. She walked to them and laid her hand on Loki’s bone thin shoulder, squeezing it lightly. “Good luck, Loki.”  
  
Her voice was sincere, as much as Tony could tell, and Loki apparently could feel it too, because he bowed his head to her with what could probably pass for a smile.  
  
When she finally left, Tony explained to Loki where they were going and then helped the god to his feet. As they made their way towards the car, it occurred to him that Loki was not only thinner, but also much shorter. He wasn’t sure what to make out of it, but it wasn’t anything good, he was quite certain about that.  
  
***  
  
They were at the airport in twenty minutes flat. Tony expected some sort of struggle, anything, when he opened the door and asked Loki to get into the car, but it didn’t happen. The god was apathetic, mostly unresponsive and frighteningly weak, if the ease with which Tony was able to move him around was any indication. It was worrisome and it certainly wasn’t normal. What was more, Loki had behaved, back in that backyard, as if he was almost _expecting_ that no one would be looking for him. For some unfathomable reason it made Tony swallow thickly. That just wasn’t right, this kind of believe that nobody cared enough.  
  
As much, as he wanted to deny it, he was afraid. He was out of his element, he didn’t know a thing about medicine or how alien princes were supposed to act and, quite frankly, he really wanted to run away from it. Only it was already way too late for that.  
  
He glanced at Loki and smiled against himself. The guy had fallen asleep a few minutes after they entered the car and didn’t wake even when they pulled up into the city. He must have been completely drained to allow it, an accident of sorts, because Tony wouldn’t believe for a second that with this level of paranoia, anyone could sleep so peacefully.  
  
Tony shook his head in slight disbelief before exiting the car. Happy was standing near the airport entrance and, if Tony wasn’t mistaken, freaking out a bit. He was holding a big paper bag with _Marshalls_ written on it in bold dark blue letters. Tony  waved and didn’t have to do much else, because Happy crossed the distance between them in a few long strides.  
  
“You got everything?”  
  
“Yes, boss.” Happy handed him the bag. “Finn said that we should be on our way in an hour or so. Apparently, Ms Potts knew you wouldn’t stick with the plan.”  
  
Ah, his dear Pepper and her almost legendary foresight.  
  
“Good,” he murmured. “That’s good.”  
  
He heard a bang and turned around in time to witness Loki’s frantic attempts to free himself from the seatbelt. He was obviously having a full-on panic attack.  
  
“Hey, kid! Calm down!” He opened the door on the passenger’s side and squatted down, catching Loki’s hands. He shook him lightly to bring him out of his haze. “It’s me. It’s Tony. Everything is fine. Just calm down.”  
  
Loki stilled. His chest was still rising and falling in rapid, uneven breaths, but at least he wasn’t trying to fight, which was a welcomed surprise. It took some time, but he eventually managed to calm himself down, the same blank expression from before taking over his features. Well, if that wasn’t weird, Tony didn’t know what was. He glanced at Happy over his shoulder and grimaced. He squeezed Loki’s hands one more time, before letting them go and standing up.  
  
“This isn’t as weird as it looks like,” he said and then laughed, because it sure as hell was even weirder. “Okay, maybe not.”  
  
Happy gave him a look, the same one Pepper used when she was absolutely done with him or wanted some explanation. The problem was, Tony truly was at the lost for words. The whole ordeal – taking Loki with him, calming him down, this strange need to protect him – were unexpected. He didn’t understand the many whys and hows that were bothering him from the very beginning, if he was being completely  honest. Not for the first time in his life, he didn’t have any answers. The fact that he couldn’t figure it out, even with his undeniably clever mind, was kind of scary, as much as he loathed to admit it.  
  
“I need to take him to Thor,” he stated finally, looking Happy in the eye with all the seriousness he could muster. “There’s something wrong – very, very _wrong_ – with him and I... Man, I just can’t leave him there. I would like to, yes, but I can’t. No one deserves to be left alone, you know? Not even this guy.”  
  
“I was going to ask, who he is, but... Well, yeah.” Happy clear his throat and Tony felt like facepalming himself with a chair, because really? How stupid was that? Instead he turned around and helped Loki out of the car. He was trying to pretend that he was too busy to say anything and really, was it him or did Loki shrink another couple of inches?  
  
They made their way into the building and then separated, when Tony took Loki to the bathroom to change into the fresh set of clothes and Happy went to check up on the jet. The trousers and the T-shirt were slightly too big, but Loki didn’t seem to mind. Tony could feel a headache forming, when he was forced to bend down and tie the guy’s shoe laces, because it was apparently impossible to do that without your eyesight intact. It was awkward for the both of them, which made him feel a little bit better. Gods help him, Tony was seriously going to murder Thor, when they got to the Tower, because dealing with the God of Mischief at his lowest was not his idea for a good evening, thank you very much.  
  
When they were done, they sat down in a small cafe and Tony bought himself a cup of extra strong coffee, because he was sure his mind was going to shut down otherwise. They spent the reminder of time there in complete silence. Unconsciously or not, Loki was holding onto Tony’s elbow the entire time, as if he was afraid that he would leave him there. If it wasn’t so terribly dramatic, he would have laughed at the sheer impossibility of this situation.  
  
Happy picked them up, when it was well past midnight, almost two hours later, but Tony was beyond caring at this point. They got into the jet a few minutes later. It instantly made him feel better, because, with JARVIS’s calm and collected voice there, it was almost as good as home. Loki had another minor panic attack, when the AI greeted them. It took all of Tony’s willpower not to laugh at his wide-eyed expression.  
  
Loki fell asleep pretty fast, in the first half an hour of their flight. He ended up curled into a tight ball in one of the seats, the hood of his jumper pulled over his head. It was kind of cute.  
  
In the meantime, Tony got JARVIS to do some basic scans and the medical evaluation. Then he asked him to send the results to both Coulson and Bruce. After he was done with it, he tried calling Pepper a few times  – an apology before she learnt of this mess was a precaution, really – but she didn’t pick up. Without anything better to do, he decided that a short nap would do him good.  
  
He was out within minutes.  
  
***  
  
He woke up three hours later. He was a bit giddy at first, because he couldn’t remember the last time he actually slept  and oh, did it feel good! He stretched and cringed, when he heard his spine pop loudly.  Sleep was maybe healthy, but those seats seriously murdered his back and neck. It kind of hurt to move.  He looked around, still a bit out of it, and his eyes widen when they landed on Loki. Or the lack of him.  
  
He got to his feet so fast, his vision filled with black dots. Thor was going to kill him, if he lost his little brother, Tony was sure of that. And then Coulson would resurrect him and kill him again. He ran around the cabin like a madman, but there was no sign of the Mischief God. Only a pile of clothes.  
  
“Fuck,” he mumbled under his breath. There was no better way to put it.  
  
When he had half a mind to ask JARVIS for help and maybe call Coulson, he heard something. He stood stock-still for a moment, before he was able to locate the source of the strange noise. It was coming out of the heap of Loki’s clothes. With a growing confusion, Tony indentified it as a childish sob. He pinched himself on the arm, just to be sure that he wasn’t imagining things, but the sound was still there, slowly getting louder.  
  
He approached the seat and then gently lifted the jumper to revile a small child. A gasp left his mouth before he was able to stop it, because _holy fucking shit, it was Loki_ and Tony couldn’t wrap him mind around this. And here he thought that he was done with the impossible for the day.  
  
Apparently, Fate hated him more than he realized.  
  
Loki was trembling and his sobs were horrible, heart wrecking and just plain wrong. His face was red from the strain of crying and wet with tears. Tony was also pretty sure that the boy was still blind and that was the main reason behind his distress.  
  
He bent down and picked him up, the too big T-shirt and polka dot undies( that looked more like trousers now) intact. Loki’s breath hitched in his throat and his whole body had gone rigid at the contact, but there was no other way to help him calm down, because Tony was too shocked to say anything at the moment. He rubbed Loki’s back in circles, as his mother would often do to him when he had been a child, and rocked him, as he walked back and forth, trying to think, which was easier said than done.  
  
When he thought that this day couldn’t get any worse, he sure as hell didn’t mean it as a challenge.


	2. Protective Measures

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I'm sorry it took so long. I actually started to write this story without planning it out properly and I got stuck in the middle of chapter 2. Sadly, it's probably going to happen again at some point... :/  
> Since I'll be going back to the university in two weeks, I'll try my best to write at least two more chapters beforehand, but I can't promise you anything. Let's just say I have had a reunion with "Naruto" quite recently and I'm back into that fandom for now, so I'm kind of unable to write anything not Naruto-related (hopefully with the exception of this story).  
> Anyway, have a nice read and please, leave a review after you're done! :)

Happy’s expression, when he saw Tony with a handful of a now hiccupping Loki, was priceless and definitely a highlight of the last few hours. The man didn’t ask any questions, probably too confused to pick one. Tony himself had a problem with determining how much of it was the product of his vivid imagination, because a grown-up turning into a child over night (or day, depending on how you looked at it)? How crazy was that?

On the brighter side, Pepper had called him soon after the miniature God of Mischief decided to go all monkey on him and she hadn’t sounded as angry as he was expecting, which was a good thing. Dealing with an angry Pepper was not something he needed right now. Or ever, really.

They spent the rest of the flight in a relative silence, except for the occasional teary hiccup. Happy had abandoned the pilot cabin and was sitting with Tony as a self-appointed bodyguard, his eyes trained on Loki, who stubbornly refused to emerge from the confines of Tony’s jacket. Not that he voiced it or anything. He just held on to the brand-new AC/DC T-shirt so tightly with his little chubby fingers that it was probably impossible to remove him without damaging it. He was surprisingly strong for someone so small, but then again – Asgardian, right? They were wired differently. At least the boy was no longer trying to suffocate him, which was an improvement. Those tiny arms were able to squeeze someone to their death, no doubt about that.

It was between early-as-fuck and this-damned-hour-shouldn’t-exist, when they landed in New York. The city greeted them with cold rain and fog so thick it was hard to see beyond the length of one’s arm. Coulson was waiting for them at the runway, hands folded over his chest. He had the whole I-didn’t-have-enough-coffee-to-deal-with-your-shit look on his face that Tony knew all too well. It was directed at him more often than not. He would even go as far as stating that Coulson never gave the look to anyone but Tony. It was pretty mean, if anyone asked him.

Manoeuvring down the stairs with arms full of a clingy kid was harder than Tony expected. For one, he couldn’t use his hands to gasp the railing and his footing was off, because of the additional weight. He somehow managed to do it without falling flat on his ass, which kind of saved him from further humiliation in front of Coulson, though there was still snot on his shoulder to do the trick. He could feel it. Children weren’t bad, but they sure as hell were gross.

“Stark.” Coulson’s voice was as collected as always. Tony seriously doubted that there was anything that could really shock the guy anymore.

“Agent Phil Son of Coul, well met,” he responded with a grin and snorted, when Coulson’s eye twitched. It happened every time someone addressed him as Thor usually did. He was quite sure it would never stop to be funny.

“Before you say anything,” he added before Coulson had a chance to even open his mouth, which earned him a glare. “I don’t know what’s going on. And I would really like to know, because I think that the amount of crazy in my life is alarming, if you ask me and I would know. Anyway, I will spill all the dirty secrets, but after we get to the Tower, because saying things twice is never fun. And I need coffee.”

“You look like you had had enough coffee, Stark,” was Coulson’s only response as he lead them to the car.

“Nobody was asking you opinion, Agent Man.”

Coulson smirked the all-knowing smirk that everyone hated, because it was fucking disturbing, and then glanced at the child before looking at Tony again.

“I thought he was an adult.”

“Well, life is full of surprises!” He hosted Loki up a bit and sighed heavily.

“I can hold him,” Coulson remarked, apparently noting his discomfort, and there was only that much Tony could do before starting to laugh. Not that the situation was really funny or anything. It was just the fact that Loki stabbed Coulson in the back and the man had just been cleared for active duty two months ago. And he wanted to hold the miniature version of the person who almost killed him. When did Tony’s life become so ridiculous?

When he calmed himself enough to do something beside snorting, he just got into the car, ignoring Coulson’s questioning look. The man got inside soon after and gave their driver directions before Tony decided to answer the unspoken question.

“He doesn’t like strangers. Happy tried to touch him back on the plane and he started crying again,” he murmured, his eyebrows knotted in slight confusion. “He seems to like me, for some reason. Then again, he is pretty scared and I can probably pass for a cuddle buddy for now.”

Coulson nodded slowly. They were quiet for a moment.

“So this is Loki.”

“Yes,” came a muffled voice and both Tony and Coulson stilled. It was the first word Loki has spoken since turning into a child.

“Hello there, kiddo,” Tony said as softly as he could, because the last thing he needed was another full-on hysteria marathon. “You okay there?”

Loki trembled, which was an answer in and on itself.

“Do you know how old are you?”

“No.”

“What is the last thing you remember?”

“Mommy was singing,” the boy answered and then added a barely audible ‘I want my mommy’, in a voice so small and broken that Tony’s heart clenched painfully. It was far worse than the crying from before. This spoke much clearer about how lost and afraid Loki truly was. He was so very fragile now and the only thing Tony could do to make it better was hug him tighter.

There were no more words said for the rest of their journey.

***

When they stepped into the Tower, there were only Thor and Bruce present in the penthouse’s living room, the former fast asleep on the couch and the latter sipping tea. Loki was sleeping, nested in Tony’s arms, exhaustion and the events of the day evidently taking their toll on him. Coulson had already disappeared to his quarters at this point, claiming that he had a few important calls to make before the team meeting.

Bruce spotted them almost immediately. He stood up and waved his hand in the general direction of the elevators. Tony nodded once, turned around and walked back where he came from, with Bruce close behind. When they rounded the corner and were finally out of Thor’s earshot (who could have guessed that the guy had such sensitive sense of hearing?), Bruce sighed heavily and rubbed his eyes. Up close he looked like someone who forgot that sleep was kind of necessary to function properly.

“I had a look at those scans JARVIS sent me,” he started and Tony cringed, because he knew that tone of voice.

“Not good?” He asked, when Bruce didn’t elaborate and the doctor nodded. “How bad exactly?”

“When he was still an adult, he was dehydrated, lacking nourishment of any kind and just very ill, generally speaking. And there was also damage to his brain – to his occipital lobe, to be more accurate. His blindness was surely caused by an injury or some sort of head trauma, but I’m not sure since I didn’t have a chance to get a closer look.” He glanced at Loki and smiled sadly. “But since he is a kid now... We need to do the tests all over again. I highly doubt the results will be the same. He does look quite healthy now.”

“The tests. Do we need to do them now or can it wait?” Tony was ready to wake Loki up if it came to that, but he was dead on his feet and the little guy deserved some rest as well. Though he wanted the answers as fast as it was possible, he was ready to wait a few hours if it meant a much desired rendezvous with his bed.

Bruce gave him a questioning look.

“The kid cried himself to sleep, Bruce. He is drained. And scared. I don’t think it will work out well if we wake him now. Plus my last cup of coffee was, like, four hours ago and I need sleep.” He yawned in emphasis. “I’m thinking about just a few hours. Then we can also ask Thor if he has any idea what has happened.”

“I guess we can wait a bit,” he said after a moment. “Speaking of Thor. He had burst into the penthouse two hours ago and all but demanded to see his brother. Who told him?”

“Told him what?” Asked Tony as he made his way towards his room.

“About Loki.”

“Oh.”

That was actually a pretty good question. If it was neither Tony nor Bruce, it left only one person. Coulson was friends with the God of Thunder, more than they were, at least, so it was quite easy to imagine that he would tell Thor about his brother’s whereabouts. Tony couldn’t blame anyone for spilling their heart to the man, because he could make the most heartbreaking puppy dog eyes known to mankind. Not that Coulson wasn’t immune to this sort of treatment, but apparently even he had limits (who knew, right?).

The question that plagued him more was why Thor haven’t told them that Loki was not in Asgard.

Thor was an open book kind of guy. He wore his feelings on his sleeve and wasn’t afraid to talk about them. He also didn’t have secrets, as far as Tony could tell, because, when he was hiding something, it was always written all over his face. For that reason surprise parties were out of question with him – he got all excited and smiled like an idiot for no apparent reason. The random hugs didn’t help at all. So how was it possible for him to keep Loki’s disappearance under wraps? Something major must have happened and Tony wasn’t particularly excited about finding out what it was exactly. Asgardian problems tended to be quite overwhelming and had disastrous consequences, as history proved time and time again.

“Well, someone certainly has a big mouth in here,” he commented. “And it’s not me.”

“Figures.” Bruce gave him a look before removing his glasses. He squeezed his eyes and started to massage them slowly. Tony was not the only one in a dire need of rest.

“Okay, off we go. And you are going to sleep too,” he announced sternly. “I won’t let you even look at the junior here, if you don’t. Si? Si.”

“Whatever you say, Tony.”

“I admire you enthusiasm, doc. Really. It’s almost infectious!” Bruce rolled his eyes in badly concealed exasperation. “What? I’m serious!”

They stopped in front of Tony’s room.

“I’ll ask JARVIS to wake you in a few hours.”

“Yeah, that’s probably a good idea,” Tony sighed heavily. “I’m so dead on my feet I could probably sleep for years.”

“We wouldn’t want that.”

“No, we wouldn’t.” Tony bent to the right and pressed the door handle with his elbow to open them. They gave in after a moment. He kicked them lightly, forcing back a smile when he looked at his bed which right now was probably the most welcoming sign for his sore eyes. “See you in a few.”

Bruce just nodded and turned around, going back the way they came. When the good doctor rounded the corner, Tony walked into the room and closed the door behind him. He then kicked off his shoes and slowly lowered himself onto the mattress, trying to do so without squashing Loki in the process. The boy didn’t even stir.

Tony laid still, flat on his back, for a long moment, his left hand absently petting Loki’s soft curly hair, and wondered sleepily if this whole situation could possibly get any weirder than that.

***

The sensation was strange – something between itching and tickling, but not nearly as uncomfortable or unpleasant, just mildly irritating. It was back and gone, and then back again and it reminded him of the awful feeling when you know that you’re about to sneeze, but then the horrible prickling in your nose goes away for a bit only to come back a moment later when you least expect it.  
  
He shifted, trying to get rid of it, but it didn’t abide, through there seemed to be a slight pause before it came back full force.

Tony blinked grudgingly, taking in a sharp breath as he stretched a little. His spine gave a loud pop and he cringed. He absolutely hated the sound of snapping bones. It reminded him too much of Afghanistan and those were never good thoughts, even when he had a bottle of scotch nearby and, if he was not mistaken, there was none in the whole tower at the moment. Pepper had gotten into some sort of wicked deal with Steve that Tony didn’t particularly want to know anything about and together they got rid of his vast collection of liquors. Traitors, all of them.

“Tony.”

His head snapped to the side so fast he was amazed he didn’t give himself a whiplash.

A pair of big green eyes was staring at him unblinkingly, which made him remember that he wasn’t exactly alone in his room.

“Hello, kid,” he greeted the godling, smiling when the boy’s face lit up like a Christmas tree.

“Hello!” Loki replied with a smile of his own. “You were sleeping really long. Were you in Odinsleep? Because dad sometimes falls into Odinsleep, you know, and I can’t waking him up then either. He only wakes up if you poke him. Thor did it once and mommy was really angry with him.”

“Um.” He blinked at the boy. He needed coffee to deal with this version of Loki. Who knew he would be so talkative? “No, I was just sleeping. Normal sleep. No biggie.”

“That’s good.”

And then it drawn on Tony. He narrowed his eyes at Loki who started to fidget a little.

“Were you poking me to wake me up, Loki?” He asked, one eyebrow raised.

The boy nodded slowly as his fidgeting got worse.

“I’m sorry,” he mumbled. He was looking down at Tony’s chest and if Tony wasn’t mistaken, there were tears in his eyes. What the hell? “I was worried and it worked with Thor, and I’m really sorry... I shouldn’t have done it... Don’t be angry at me...!”

“Hey, hey!” He sat up and gently grasped Loki’s slightly shaking shoulders. “I’m not mad at you. I was only curious, because you kind of spilled the beans yourself with that story about Thor poking your father.”

“You’re not angry?” The owlish look of complete bewilderment adoring Loki’s round face shouldn’t be so funny, but Tony was still before his first cup of coffee and strange things tended to amuse him when he was short on caffeine.

“No, I’m not.”

“But why?” If it was possible, Loki’s eyes were even wider now.

“Well, I don’t get angry easily. And it was funny.” From a lack of better things to do, he ruffled the boy’s hair. “And a piece of advice for the future – don’t dig your own grave, buddy, by basically telling on yourself. It kills the joke.”

The lack of coffee, it was all because of the lack of coffee. That was the only explanation as to why he was giving advice on successfully pulling someone’s leg to a freaking God of Mischief.

The fact that Loki nodded solemnly with a very serious look on his face as if he was going to remember Tony’s words for the rest of his life only proved that Tony should refrain from all human to human (or human to princes-from-other-dimensions, for that matter) interactions before caffeine really kicked in. Speaking about caffeine, he was seriously craving some right now.

“Okay, we’re getting up,” he said as he stretched one last time before moving to the side of the bed and then standing up. “I need coffee and you need a breakfast, little man.”

Loki jumped up and moved to where Tony was standing without a word. He extended his arms as if waiting to be picked up and Tony did just that, hoisting him on his left hip.

***

“So he can see now.”

“Yep.”

“And he is actually hyper in the morning.”

“Yep.”

Loki dashed by Tony and Bruce at the speed of a mini cannon ball, chasing after Colonel, Steve’s German Shepard puppy, like there was no tomorrow.

After they had walked out of the bedroom, Tony took them straight to the kitchen where he prepared a bowl of Lucky Charms for the bour to munch on before someone more culinary-adapt decided to grace them with their presence. Soon enough Bruce and Steve had joined them at the counter, the latter swiftly starting to make something that was remotely nutritious while still being tasty. Loki wolfed it all down – two bowls of cereal, a plate full of pancakes and some sliced fruits – before his attention was drawn to the Tower’s mascot.

Colonel was, for all intents and purposes, Steve’s pet, but there wasn’t one person in the entire Tower who didn’t love the damned dog. Being the man he was, Cap was apparently incapable of refusing anyone who needed his help and so he had picked the little black-and-brown ball of fur from the cardboard box with words “FREE PUPS” spelled on the side that someone had left in a back alley near Steve’s favourite cafe. Since that day no pair of shoes, no newspaper, no book, no food, and no piece of furniture was safe if left unattended, but somehow no one seemed to mind. Animals, as much as children (at least in Tony’s limited experience), had this uncanny ability to grow on you until you couldn’t very well imagine your life without them.

As Tony watched Loki jump over a pillow, which had found its way onto the floor in the last half an hour of complete madness, he made a mental note to never give the kid this much sugar in the morning, just to stay on the safe side.

“Where is Goldilocks?” Tony asked, glancing at Bruce before turning around to pour himself another cup of coffee. “I thought he would be glued to Loki’s side.”

“No idea.” Bruce shrugged his shoulders. “Maybe he got a mission?”

“Nah. I can’t believe he would have accepted it with this little guy here.” Tony gestured in the general direction of Loki. Then he heard a childish giggle and turned around, only to cringe at the scene. Colonel had Loki pinned to the floor and was licking his face while the child tried to push him off rather unsuccessfully, all the while giggling like a maniac. “Bad dog! And Loki! Just ugh, this is so gross!”

He put his cup on the counter and then quickly made his way over to the two. He grabbed Colonel’s collar to drag him away. When he was sure that the dog was a safe distance away, he helped Loki to his feet before hoisting him up onto his hip and bringing him to the kitchen. Once there he fetched a towel and brought them both in front of the sink. He damped the towel and without further ado proceeded to wipe off the dog salvia from the kid’s scrunched up face.

“Stop doing that. You’ll get wrinkles,” he admonished and forced himself to remain calm when he heard a series of chuckles from Bruce’s general direction. Steve, who was standing to his left, was clearing his throat too forcefully for it to be merely a coincidence. Damn traitors. That was so not funny.

“I see that you have embraced on your new role, Stark.”

Tony stiffened. His eyes moved away from Loki’s face to land on Coulson’s. The man was smiling at him smugly. Great. Just the thing he needed to make his day better.

“Son of Coul,” he greeted him and smirked, when Coulson’s smile dropped. Point for him. “Maybe you can tell us where Tall, Packed and Blond went off to?”

“Thor is in Asgard,” the agent replied calmly as he helped himself to a cuppa. “I sent him off two hours ago.”

Tony felt Loki go rigid in his arms.

And it gets even better!

“Thor was here?” The kid asked quietly, his voice breaking slightly at the end and his lips quivering in a sure sign of an upcoming sobbing marathon. He discarded the towel and hugged Loki closer while giving Coulson a death glare so ferocious it was a true miracle that the man was still alive.

Secret agent his ass. Was he socially crippled or something? Maybe the near death experience had indeed left a permanent mark on his brain that was somehow able to prevent him for thinking before speaking, because even Tony wasn’t as clueless and he had no brain-to-mouth filter whatsoever.

“Why exactly did you send him to Asgard?” He asked after calming himself with a few deep breaths. He was getting ridiculously protective over Loki and the last thing he needed right now was to go mother-bear on one of his colleagues.

“I didn’t send him, actually. I’ve phrased it wrong, sorry. He decided to go and pay his parents a visit to ‘seek answers he knew not’, as he had put it,” Coulson said as he took a sip of his coffee. “He had also said that he would be back the day after tomorrow.”

“Oh, okay,” Tony murmured as he patted Loki’s back. The kid was not shaking anymore, but he was once again hiccupping. “So, till then...”

“Till then we will do our own research,” the agent finished for him. “Doctor Banner is actually ready to proceed with the tests.”

“Right. What about Fury?”

“He is aware of the situation.”

“And he had nothing to say? What a surprise. Pepper?”

“He had had a lot to say, but none of it is child-appropriate.” Tony cringed. For some reason he was starting to anticipate a very angry phone call from one Man of Fury and he wasn’t looking forward to it at all. “As for Pepper,” Coulson continued without a hitch, “she has been informed as well and is, I believe, currently working on Loki’s wardrobe situation.”

He nodded slowly. That sounded like Pepper.

“Okay, let’s go then.”

Bruce waved his hand in the general direction of the elevators.

***

They had been down in the labs for at least an hour. Steve had come with them after forcing a plate full of pancakes into Coulson’s hands and instructing him to actually eat it this time instead of throwing it away. Tony had a sneaky suspicion he had done it just to spite the agent for upsetting Loki who was yet to recover. Though the kid wasn’t crying or trembling like a leaf, he was too quiet and he looked like a kicked puppy, which made both Tony and Steve uncomfortable.

As the three of them waited for Bruce to give them a green light to go, Tony really took the time to think over his situation.

Contrary to popular belief, Tony Stark liked kids, even if it took him a significant amount of time, one kidnapping by terrorists, saving the world from a psycho prince from outer space and a number of life-threatening situations to come to that conclusion. There was no better time to think, after all, then when an alien army was trying to annihilate the human race. Or when someone decided to throw him out of the window. Or when someone almost razed his house to the ground with him, his girlfriend and his ex inside. Seriously, how sick was that? Tony didn't know what was wrong with his brain, but he was pretty sure he really didn't want to pick it out into pieces to find out. Sometimes he agreed that ignorance was bliss.

Anyway, it probably had something to do with getting older (Tony was not old, shut up, Barton!) and the whole procreation thingy. Not that he felt notably inclined to produce an offspring, because no. Just no. Hands down, one Tony Stark was enough for the entire universe and beyond.

How he had ended up as little Loki’s temporary guardian was beyond him. Then again the kid seemed to like him. Only him and Colonel The Dog. And he was going to maybe like Pepper, but Pepper was amazing and everybody liked her.

When Steve had informed him that he was in fact a father now, Tony had half a mind to go back up to the penthouse and scream bloody murder at Coulson before blowing him to smithereens where he stood with a well-placed blast of his arc repulsors.

Because as much as Tony liked kids, he was no father material and he was damn sure that he was going to fail miserably at fathering Loki, who was already showing signs of emotional instability and some other issues that needed to be addressed sooner rather than later. He was also smart enough to realize immediately that he felt some sort of attachment to the boy. It was hard not to, really, because Loki was the cutest brat ever. From what Tony had gather about him in the last few hours, the boy was very affectionate, full of smiles, a total hugger, clingy as hell, very sensitive, and had an appetite of a person three times his size. To put it simply, he cared about him and didn’t want to hurt him, which he was bound to do at some point.

“Alright.” Tony snapped out of this thoughts at the sound of Bruce’s voice. “The last thing I need is a blood sample and you can go.”

All the colour drained from Loki’s face at the word ‘blood’, but he didn’t say anything when Bruce approached him with a syringe and three little flasks. Tony smirked at the facade of bravery, though he kept his mouth shut and didn’t dare to comment on it. Loki winced slightly when the needle pierced his skin and refused to look at his arm as Bruce took one sample after another, apparently determined to live through the experience without breaking down.

When the doctor was finally done, Tony hoisted Loki up into his arms.

“You’re one tough cookie, you know.” A pair of green eyes blinked at him curiously. “You didn’t cry, when Bruce got your blood. That’s very brave, if you ask me.”

Loki’s eyes widened comically almost instantly.

“Brave?” He asked timidly, as if he couldn’t believe someone actually called him that. Tony had a feeling that it was probably true. Even as an adult, when compared to Thor, Loki seemed small and he truly looked like a shadow of his brother. They were like night and day. He could only imagine the difference, when they were still children. In the Asgardian culture, where strength and honour seemed to be everything, Loki with his willowy body and magic must have been called anything but that. For whatever reason, it made Tony really feel for the kid. A childhood deprived of acknowledgement and encouragement was awful and he knew it better than anyone.

“Yup, the bravest,” he declared and watched as a small smile slowly crept onto Loki’s face.

Maybe he wasn’t going to suck so much at being a parent after all.


End file.
